Wednesday, August 31, 2011

One of These Things is Not Like the Other

I am so excited for fall.  Even though the weather here won't really turn cool until October, I find myself daydreaming about skirt and boot season.  This year I'm really excited for all of the two-tone boot options.

I'm quite fond of these ankle boots from Vivienne Westwood.  If I lived in Victorian England or was a Steampunk princess I'd be all over them.

I don't think I'm hip enough to understand Steampunk though, I like my science fiction like I like my vacuums; heavy on the robots.

So, for my own, unhip self, these Burberry quilted leather booties are absolute perfection.

I don't think you need to be in a constant state of irony to wear them.

If you can believe it Ugg Australia has actually come out with a gorgeous boot for Fall/Winter 2011.  I had to double check the advertisement in the Fall Vogue to make sure my eyes weren't deceiving me.
But they weren't, these are totally Uggs!

Marc by Marc Jacobs managed to get on the trend using the same color but two different fabrics.

I don't know why, but I rather love the corduroy.  It almost makes me want to cuddle the boots.

My absolute favorite two tone boots this season are the United Nude Spats.

I love everything about this boot.  EVERYTHING.

With so many great options for this trend it's hard to go wrong.

But not impossible.  Tip of the hat to Prada for their collaboration with Runway to Green.  You know, just because something is earth-friendly doesn't make it eye-friendly.  It's like passing a car accident, you don't want to look, you know it's wrong to look, and yet there you are, rubbernecking, staring, and feeling ashamed.

I know, I'm surprised too, I like a pair of Uggs and hate something from Prada.  Did we just experience a geomagnetic reversal or something?

Tuesday, August 30, 2011

The Cordwainer and the Stoats

You've heard the story about the Elves and the Shoemaker?  There is a lesser known fairy tale about a poor cordwainer and his pet ferrets.  It's lesser known because I just made it up, but that's neither here nor there.

Once upon a time a cordwainer had a lovely little shop, but the shoes he made were so elegant that it took him a very long time to finish each shoe commissioned by his clients.  He worked his knuckles to the bone and never made it home before midnight.  He missed his family but he knew that they depended on the money he made in order to keep food on the table and a roof over their heads.

Now in the cordwainer's shop, he had two pet ferrets to keep him from being lonely while he meticulously crafted his much coveted shoes.  Every morning the cordwainer would come into the store, still exhausted from the previous day's work, scratch the ferrets ears and tell them what lovely darlings they were for keeping the old shoemaker company during his long, laborious and lonely days.  Every evening the ferrets watched as the cordwainer suffered for his art until the point of exhaustion before going home.   His dedication to his art so moved the ferrets that the sweet stoats decided one evening after the cordwainer had left they would help finish the leather buckle boots that the shoemaker was working on for one of his wealthy clients.

Unfortunately ferrets are not known for the dexterity of their paws and the little guys managed to sew themselves into the shoes.

Christian Louboutin Toundra Fur Boot

The client for whom the boots were commissioned came early in the morning and picked up the shoes from the cordwainer's young apprentice who was unaware that the ferrets had managed to sew themselves into the shoe.  The cordwainer always wondered what happened to his little friends.  He assumed that the smarter than average ferrets managed to find their way out of the shoe shop via a crack in one of the windows.

As for the cordwainer's fate, a fair princess saw the woman wearing the ferret boots and was so amazed that she hired the shoemaker as her private cobbler.  His family moved to the kingdom and as he was completely provided for by one client he was able to not only keep his family fed and happy, he was able to see them more often.

The end.

Monday, August 29, 2011

Monday Multifuction

I typically wear a pant between a size 4 and a size 6 depending on the cut, but usually, even if a 4 is too small, the six is too big resulting in the need for a belt.  Sometimes I don't really notice the fact that my pants are a bit too loose until I'm already out of the house and smack dab in the middle of the day. 

I think my inbetween status is the perfect excuse to buy this pair of Nicholas Kirkwood Fall/Winter 2011 ankle boots.

If I feel my pants start heading south I can unbuckle the strap from the shoe and I have a matching belt ready to go! 

Oh, who am I kidding, those shoes are so handsome I'd never deface them by removing the strap.  I'll just have to remember to always wear sexy underwear. 

More multifunction?  Sure.

Sunday, August 28, 2011

Then and Now: Tokio Kumagai

Before Lady Gaga had her Franc Fernandez meat shoes,

Tokio Kumagai created a "Shoes to Eat" series in 1984.

Unlike Gaga's outfit, Kumagai did not use real meat, but rather resins (the same resins used to make fake/plastic food) to create his shoes.

Before there were mouse shoes from Marc by Marc Jacobs,

Kumagai had his mouse flats.

I hope this trend continues and a designer recreates his sundae shoe.

Kumagai attended Bunka Fashion College before working in Paris for Castlebajac and then for one of my favorites, Cerruti, in Italy.  He opened his own boutique in 1981.  Though known mostly for his quirky shoes, Kumagai also designed many elegantly simple pumps.

Sadly, he died only 7 years after opening his store at the age of 40 from liver cancer.  But his shoes live on to inspire.

Saturday, August 27, 2011

Stand back! There's a Hurricane coming through!

So, the secret is out.  I have seen an episode or five of Thursday Night Smackdown.

Anywhoodle, this far inland we're just expecting a bit of rain and a few gusts of wind, nothing major.  So my personal hurricane preparedness kit for this one looks a little something like this:

Kindly ignore the dirty door frame and dog-nosed glass.  I clean it regularly, but, hey, dogs.

That would be a pair of Hunter wellies (though I had plenty of other options), a bottle of Yellow Tail Bubbles (I'm cheap when it comes to hurricane booze), Vogue, and a Hayden Harnett for Target umbrella.

To all my friends north easterly of me, I hope you brought in your lawn furniture, have plenty of bottled water and non-perishables and stay safe and dry this weekend!

Friday, August 26, 2011

HKNB New Balance on Project Runway

Ugg.  Last night's Project Runway was entirely unwatchable.  And no wonder.  The sneakers the designers had to work around were sooooooo boring.

Heidi, I love you, but really?

What was I saying?  I accidentally dozed off.  The only beautiful thing in this episode was Olivier's bruise.

I think I'll just stick to my Brooks Ariels for my workouts (what, I have flat arches!  No, they are NOT orthopedics, watch yo'self!).

Thursday, August 25, 2011

Excuse me ma'am, your legs are moulting.

Some people see a Lesser Goldfinch in mid-moult and think,


Not Brian Atwood.  He sees a bird in mid-moult and thinks, "shoes."

To-may-to, to-mah-to, I say.

True story, once a bird flew into my old apartment and proceeded to poop on my Ikea POANG chair; I'm still a bit bitter towards birds.

Wednesday, August 24, 2011

I Feel the Earth Move Under My Feet

If we're gonna start getting earthquakes on the east coast I'm gonna have to invest in some new footwear.

Ready to roll with it!

Tuesday, August 23, 2011

Shoes That Aren't Shoes

You would think, as much as I love shoes, I'd be all over anything shoe-themed.  You'd be wrong though.  For the most part, I just can't really get on board with shoes that aren't shoes.

For instance, in my jewelry box you will not find a shoe charm.  Not a cheap charm you can get on

Nor a more expensive charm from Tiffany.

And not the limited edition Louboutin charm designed to raise money for cancer research.

I love Manolo Blahnik, but I'd rather his real shoes than the limited edition printed scarves he did for Liberty London.

Though, I must admit, of anything shoe related a scarf is what I'd most likely wear.  The colors are fun and I'm sure you can't really tell they're shoes when the scarf is folded.

I will not smell like Anna Dello Russo just because her perfume comes in a golden shoe bottle.

And, having never actually smelled Anna Dello Russo at all, I'm not sure I'd like "The Scent of Anna Dello Russo."  I know the Scent of Katie is probably a mixture of sweat, Robert Piguet, and that Sundried Tomato Yogurt Cheese I love so much, not something any woman would want to keep on their perfume vanity trays.

And I'm sorry, I'll pay good money for a pair of shoes for my feet but $500 for champagne that comes with a limited edition Louboutin decanter?  No thanks, that $500 can stay in my shoe fund. 

I must admit though, I do find something appealing about the Louis Vuitton silk embroidered dress (specifically the one on the far right).  But still, not something I'd wear (the shoes are fabulous though).

Let's see the one on the right a bit closer shall we?

Perhaps it's just the black on black pattern I like...  Those shoes are still calling to me though.

Monday, August 22, 2011

Is It Fall Yet?

Nope, 90 degrees.  Still too warm for boots.  Sigh.

McQ Lace-Up Booties in Oatmeal and Black

Sunday, August 21, 2011

Picked the Wrong Day to Quit Sniffing Glue

Am I hallucinating these Boxer Leather Cut Out Sandals from Rick Owens?
Oddly, this is exactly what I see when I stare into the sun too long.

Saturday, August 20, 2011

The Grumpy Townie

In 1962 during the Cuban Missile Crisis Americans began stockpiling goods in the event of a nuclear war.

Every August, two weekends before the start of September, I begin stockpiling as well.  Why?  I live in a college town.  This weekend every grocery store, each big box store, all office supply stores will be overrun with out of towners who are stressed, exhausted, and saying a long goodbye to their babies for the first time.  You do NOT want to be at Target picking up nail polish remover this weekend.

Driving through my town during move in weekend is like driving in India any day of the year.

I swear, these incoming freshman kamikaze across the parking lot, parents are arguing in the car about where to turn and are completely unable to look before merging because their car is completely stocked with all of junior's crap.  And despite having enough shit in their car to sustain a small country, they will still find a reason to run to Target, the grocery store, the mall and every area restaurant I so love. 

I plan on spending this weekend hiding under my quilt, mumbling angrily, and behaving pretty much like every other townie out there.

I'm in the unique position of living in an uber-college town.  While my own city only has two universities (and a community college) I am wedged between two cities with state universities and several smaller colleges.  The Target a quarter mile from my home is the "good" Target (which is utter bull fecal matter, it's just in a prettier part of town).  Every parent that manages to miss the turn into Target will turn around in my lazy little neighborhood and not watch for regular traffic coming into or leaving my little street.

But, other than the nightmare that is move in weekend the local colleges and universities are good for my town.  So, today, I honor the big four that will all but shut down the shopping plaza down the road.

First up is Duke University.  The Duke gardens is one of my favorite places in town.  I like to take the dogs there, read a book, have a picnic, take pictures and enjoy the flowers.

For the Devilish Duke girl I recommend this very sexy pair of Pucci Patent Leather Boots.

Next in Durham is North Carolina Central University.  
True story, Christopher "Play" Martin of Kid and Play was a professor in the music department at NCCU.  He still lives here in Durham and every time I find myself at a grocery store I don't normally frequent I think to myself, "I wonder if Professor and Play shops here" and I spend the majority of my time looking in every aisle for him.  I've never seen him.  Yet.

Back to shoes though, a pair of Theyskens' Theory Patent Leather and Suede Ombre Wedges in maroon is perfect for an Eagle.

Just down the road from me is the University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill.  UNC students are kamikaze pedestrians beyond move in weekend.  Just visit Franklin Street on any game day.

Anyway, I keep trying to convince a coworker of mine who is a UNC alum to get these Kate Spade Cam Too pumps for her upcoming wedding.  She NEEDS some UNC blue shoes under her wedding gown.  There is no question in my mind.

And last it's time to put our wolf-ears up.

Oh my, don't worry Debbie, you'll figure it out.
Now North Carolina State University is the furthest from my house and while they don't tend to descend on my local eateries and stores I do live quite close to a "destination mall."  So I'm guaranteed to run into someone from the Wolf Pack while going to the movies or stopping by Paneras.
State totally wins on the sexiest colors for shoes contest.  Nicholas Kirkwood's ankle boots are ideal for leading the pack.

So, to all the incoming freshman in my area, know that while we townies might grumble and groan on move in weekend, we are very happy to have you here.  Enjoy these four years, enjoy all the area has to offer, and we promise, once this weekend is over you will experience that southern hospitality you've been told about.  For the love of all that is holy though, STOP trying to decorate the grill of my car with your body.

Friday, August 19, 2011

A Little Bit Country, A Little Bit Rock 'N' Roll

First, Donny Osmond is about as rock and roll as a cucumber sandwich with the crusts carefully cut off. That is to say he's not rock at all. Keep up with me people.

Can you be a Mormon rocker; is it even allowed?

No, Randy Bachman does not count.

"We found some things that couldn't be reconciled...Religion is a bunch of rules, a fear factor."
~Randy Bachman, 2008 Interview, Chattanooga Times Free Press

Maybe I'll give you Brandon Flowers.  Maybe.  All I'm saying is even if Mormons can be hardcore rockers, Donny Osmond is NOT one of them.

Did I have a point?

I like that peaceful easy feeling of a laid back country song.

Cobra Society Hand-Woven Wool and Brushed-Leather Boots are a little bit of country too.

So are these Roberto Cavalli Leather Applique Cowboy Boots.

They're a bit of Memphis and Nashville.

And this pair of Burberry Buckle-Detailed Leather Knee Boots are a little bit full grown woman...

...but not at all a little bit of a child (sorry Marie).

Now, when I sing my rock 'n roll, I can sing it all night long.  Preferably while wearing the Burberry Explorer Leather Biker Boots.

I go out on Saturday night for a little bit of rock and roll.

And wear Chloe Biker Leather Boots to intimidate all the other rockers.

And naturally the Marc by Marc Jacobs Buckled Leather Ankle Boots have a bit of Motown in their sole (see what I did there?).

What about you?  Are you a little bit country?  Are you a little bit rock and roll?

Thursday, August 18, 2011

Pepperidge Farm Remembers

Do you remember when you were little and your mom would sew your mittens to your coat so you wouldn't lose them?

Why am I suddenly reminded of that?

Sergio Rossi, September '11 Elle
I can't imagine.

Wednesday, August 17, 2011

Phoning It In

I think Maxwell is trying to call you.

 Better answer.

Agent 99 prefers her shoe phone in pink.

This one is probably easier to wear though.