Picture it, Sicily 1912, a beautiful young peasant girl with clear olive skin meets an exciting but penniless Spanish artist, there's an instant attraction... Miami 1987, four women of a certain age are sharing a house, eating a cheesecake and lamenting the fact that there are no designer orthopedic shoes.
Fast forward to 2011, I'm sure Rose, Blanche, Dorothy and Sofia would love the flatform options available.
These ankle strap flatforms from Jeffrey Campbell are actually a little over the top for Dorothy Zbornak being patent, but I think she'd definitely break these out the next time she goes to a charity dance marathon.
Sophia Petrillo may have been the shortest, but she was the most confident. She didn't need heels to feel big, she was big!
Sophia would probably wear the lowest of the flatforms with these Calvin Klein sandals. I'm sure they remind her of Sicily, 1928, somehow.
I'm sure they didn't have Cacharel in St. Olaf, Minnesota, which is a shame because Rose Nylund would have loved these J Platform Sandals.
Like the old saying, you can lead a herring to water but you have to walk really fast or it will die.
Last up we have that hussy, Blanche Devereaux, of course she would wear heeled flatforms from Calvin Klein.
These shoes scream "Like I'm the only one who has ever mixed a margarita in a sailor's mouth." That is, if by sailor you mean "septuagenarian" and by mouth you mean "glass on the nightstand with dentures and Polident in it."
So there we have it, four shoes suitable for sassy ladies avoiding Shady Pines.
"Your work is going to fill a large part of your life, and the only way to be truly satisfied is to do what you believe is great work. And the only way to do great work is to love what you do."
We can go back to shoes tomorrow. For today we remember a great innovator.
My motorcycle gang, The Hell's Belles, does not ride on rainy days.
Humidity + Helmet = Insanely Bad Hair. I'm truly a math genius, y'all.
If we did ride in the rain, however, I imagine we'd all love these Wellington boots from Valentino.
The motorcycle shaped boot in black speaks to the Hell raiser in us and the twee bow speaks to the lady. This is truly the only boot appropriate for a Hell's Belle to wear on her Chopper on the way to discuss The Help at her monthly book club meeting.
Don't forget, it's your turn to bring the deviled eggs. And of course you'll use the lovely Blue Ridge Rooster Deviled Egg Plate that belonged to your grandmother and NOT a Tupperware platter like Mary did at the last meeting. Bless her heart.
