Thank You For Being a Friend

Picture it, Sicily 1912, a beautiful young peasant girl with clear olive skin meets an exciting but penniless Spanish artist, there's an instant attraction... Miami 1987, four women of a certain age are sharing a house, eating a cheesecake and lamenting the fact that there are no designer orthopedic shoes.

Fast forward to 2011, I'm sure Rose, Blanche, Dorothy and Sofia would love the flatform options available.

These ankle strap flatforms from Jeffrey Campbell are actually a little over the top for Dorothy Zbornak being patent, but I think she'd definitely break these out the next time she goes to a charity dance marathon.

Sophia Petrillo may have been the shortest, but she was the most confident.  She didn't need heels to feel big, she was big!

Sophia would probably wear the lowest of the flatforms with these Calvin Klein sandals.  I'm sure they remind her of Sicily, 1928, somehow.

I'm sure they didn't have Cacharel in St. Olaf, Minnesota, which is a shame because Rose Nylund would have loved these J Platform Sandals.

 

Like the old saying, you can lead a herring to water but you have to walk really fast or it will die.

Last up we have that hussy, Blanche Devereaux, of course she would wear heeled flatforms from Calvin Klein.

These shoes scream "Like I'm the only one who has ever mixed a margarita in a sailor's mouth."  That is, if by sailor you mean "septuagenarian" and by mouth you mean "glass on the nightstand with dentures and Polident in it."

So there we have it, four shoes suitable for sassy ladies avoiding Shady Pines.